Slowly
Sales trips have taught me to pay attention to the silences. Far away from home, from the distraction of comfort and context, you can hear the rattle of all of the loose pieces inside of you. Everything that is not settled, trying to fit into the puzzle that you cannot help but put together. Today, I have caught myself stuffing the silences with frenetic activity so I don't have to hear how empty I am between bouts of anxiety. I'm not always like this. I know you know this, but today I need to say it so I remember. I need to remember so I can hear the sound of grace fill the gaps inside of me, to make the quiet less intimidating. It takes heroic amounts of effort to ignore internal unrest once you are in a strange city with no friends nearby, when you are your only context. Sure, there are computers and phones to connect you, but it is just a layer you apply to make the silence less abrasive. Distractions just tint the silence a different shade. This year, I ha...
